Your inner critic is lying to you. You did it!
You just did a show! You did it. You did the thing. You were there, with your team, in that moment making something that didn’t exist before. You really did it!
I'd like you to allow yourself to get off stage happy with just the simple fact that you did a thing.
Was it great? Maybe, maybe not. Some people might think so, some might not. You might not. You might, but someone else in your team might not. You know what—who cares!? It’s ethereal and it’s gone now. "If it’s not easy, you're learning and that’s amazing” (Ward, J. 2017). A so-called "bad" show, whether it’s just you or the whole damn theatre who thought it was bad, is no reason to be sad! There will be another one. And another... and another. You’ll get better, and better and better.
I've had shows ruined by getting off stage and hearing someone on my team spitting fire at themselves, or worse, me, for the show being bad. Life is too damn short for that! I want to be great, I really do, I work at it every day, I obsess over improv all the time. I really give a shit about this art form. I truly find beauty in the process of improvisation: two humans interlocking and finding the show together in a moment is up there with my favourite things, ever. However, if I perform some real potent garbage, which I feel like I did as recently as last Saturday, I need to learn from it and I laugh at it. I learn nothing from hating myself for it.
Scott Williams, a master Meisner teacher from the UK put it to me like this:
- Your inner critic is the loudest voice in every room.
- Your inner critic lies to you.
- You believe it.
- You can’t work while it’s talking to you.
(Williams, S 2016)